The Bluff is a humorous and satirical section published in the Loyolan. All quotes attributed to real figures are completely fabricated; persons otherwise mentioned are completely fictional.

An open letter to POTUS

Students' exposure to politics has them tuned in to the political world which is great for 2020, but they're turned off to Trump and his antics.

Dear Mr. President,

You are a reality television star. You share more commonalities with the cast of “Jersey Shore” than you do with the general public. It’s mostly the bad tan and the annoying voice, but a part of it is that, at one point, a lot of people liked you from a distance. Though, unlike the gods of “Jersey,” you haven’t quite faded away yet, and we hate that. But by forcing your way into the spotlight this long, you’ve created the most compelling reality TV show possible — “American Politics.”

Thank you for making politics a mirror image of your likeliness. Now that news and media play like a reality TV show, it gets people hooked. This is especially true for younger generations. Children are boycotting school because of politics these days. That’s never been done before.

Yes, we watch every time you’re on TV. Yes, every tweet you post will likely be nationally broadcasted. And yes, your daily mood swings can alter the stock market, but let me make myself clear: we are not obsessed with you. We just love you in “Politics.” If we don’t, we at least have an opinion on what’s going on.

You made daily political life as unbelievable as “The Biggest Loser” and as scandalous as “Big Brother.” It caught everyone’s attention and, like they say in showbiz, “There’s no such thing as bad publicity.” 

I just wonder what the spinoff will be. Hopefully something with more of your wife and less of you.

With much thought,

Someone Like Me

Andrew Dazé Senior English Major Bluff Section editor, left handed, cries when inebriated, lover, but can fight

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