The Bluff is a humorous and satirical section published in the Loyolan. All quotes attributed to real figures are completely fabricated; persons otherwise mentioned are completely fictional.

Poppy Pickers Pick up time

The super bloom is an Instagram phenomenon that brings the California poppy into the spotlight with its vibrant orange colors. It primarily takes place in the Lake Elsinore area, and locals are not as excited as they once were with all of the unwanted traffic. They have since decided to bring law enforcement in to help manage the crowds.

The actions taken by the police are being called an extreme overreach of power by some but an essential step to protecting the environment by others. Patrons and visitors to the super bloom event were held at gunpoint for three hours. “There are laws to protect the state flower and that’s what we plan to do, protect the flowers,” said Deputy Officer Fowler. “No poppy will be hurt,” affirmed Assistant Deputy Bloom.

Thirty-three Instagram influencers are in police custody after the standoff that lasted for over three and a half hours. “Man this is some bull-donk,” said Peter Oppy, @P_Oppy, an influencer with over 150,000 followers. “I’ve never been to jail, what am I supposed to do when they ask why I’m doing my time? I was picking a flower,” worried Oppy.

The police encounter has brought a lot of attention to the poppy law in the state capital where Governor Gavin Newsom has issued a statement about the interaction and potential law changes. He stated, “As a native Californian I have grown up loving and revering the poppy. I congratulate the police active in the holdup with medals of honor. As for the poppy law, I plan on throwing every dirty flower stomper in the slammer for as long as I can."

(0) comments

Welcome to the discussion.

Keep it Clean. Please avoid obscene, vulgar, lewd, racist or sexually-oriented language.
Don't Threaten. Threats of harming another person will not be tolerated.
Be Truthful. Don't knowingly lie about anyone or anything.
Be Nice. No racism, sexism or any sort of -ism that is degrading to another person.
Be Proactive. Use the 'Report' link on each comment to let us know of abusive posts.
Share with Us. We'd love to hear eyewitness accounts, the history behind an article.